


It's a Remaster...We Remastered the Glitches in HD

by Thiocyanate



Series: A Bard, A Witcher and A Hunter's Dark Soul -- Humorous One-Shots (Featuring decimation of the 4th wall) [2]
Category: Dark Souls (Video Games), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Bards, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Canon-Typical Violence, Cute Jaskier | Dandelion, Dark Fantasy, F/M, Female Chosen Undead (Dark Souls), Gen, Inspired by Dark Souls (Video Game), Lambert Being a Little Shit (The Witcher), Lambert Being an Asshole (The Witcher), M/M, Meta, Multi, Sarcasm, Sassy, Souls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:22:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25778872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thiocyanate/pseuds/Thiocyanate
Summary: Enemy AI in DSR is a little off. They will chase you across the world and then jump off a cliff.Support me? https://ko-fi.com/christyp
Series: A Bard, A Witcher and A Hunter's Dark Soul -- Humorous One-Shots (Featuring decimation of the 4th wall) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1835365
Kudos: 2





	It's a Remaster...We Remastered the Glitches in HD

“You can come out now Dandelion, it’s dead and, by the Gods, stop screaming!” the chosen undead shouted toward the bard who was hiding from the Taurus demon between the bridge railing and the entrance.

“That was amazing!” he said as he crawled out of his hiding spot

“You were facing away from the fight the entire time” the chosen undead replied coolly

“You just killed a beast that was three times bigger than you, on a narrow bridge!”

“It’s almost like she also had a professional monster killer on her side” Lambert scoffed “what’s with the body disappearing like that?”

“It turned into souls for me to absorb” the chosen undead replied

“So let me get this straight...every time you kill something, its souls are transferred to you and souls are used to strengthen thus tougher enemies have more souls for you to then use to toughen yourself?” Lambert asked

The chosen undead nodded “yeah that’s correct”

“That’s kind of fucked up”

“Just wait until you hear about infusing weapons with the souls of the fallen” she laughed “the bridge up here is called ‘Hellkite Bridge’ needless to say, we’re going to be sprinting across it”

“We have only one life, chosen undead” Dandelion reminded her “Should we risk it?”

“I have a crossbow” Lambert added 

“Actually” she replied “there’s a glitch I can exploit”

The two men watched in awe as the dragon walked off the bridge, not even bothering to fly off.

“Wait for it” she said “just give it a second”

After about 5 minutes, the mass of souls floated toward her.

“How did you do that?” Lambert asked “in all my years as a witcher, I’ve never seen a beast fall to its death, especially if it could fly away!”

“It’s interesting” she started “enemy AI is oddly exploitable in some areas”

“What?” Dandelion and Lambert asked in near perfect unison.

“Don’t worry about it”


End file.
